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    Latest Misheard Stories

    Artist: Statler Brothers

    Song: Eve

    The Story: Don't eat the fruit in the garden, Eden,, It wasn't in God's natural plan., You were only a rib,, And look at what you did,, To Adam, the father of Man.

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    Artist: Queens of the Stone Age

    Song: You Can't Quit Me Baby

    The Story: You smell like goat, I'll see you in hell

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    Artist: Starship

    Song: Sarah

    The Story: All the b***h had said, all been washed in black

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    Artist: Iron Maiden

    Song: The Prisoner

    The Story: And my blunt is my ho now

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    Artist: Pearl Jam

    Song: Jeremy

    The Story: At home, drawing pictures, Of mounds of tots, With ham on top

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    My head smelled just like tuba lube.

    Artist: Pink Floyd
    Real Lyric: My hands felt just like two balloons.

    The story:

    I was stoned one day, and realized that tubas were not part of the album's plot. So I spent an hour rummaging around looking for the words. When I finally found them I decided I wasn't worthy of the song, and now avoid it at all costs.

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    before pulling out the record sleeve, I recall that my roommates and I discussed the possibilities of these lyrics being Toopaloons or Tuba Looms, but we finally decided "two balloons" was probably what Roger wrote. Tuba Lube is hilarious, though.

    stillfirstinspace Oct 19, 2011 3:33 am

    Agree with smackymcgee. Story is funnier than the lyrics.

    DXMarx Aug 05, 2011 1:10 pm

    My hand felt just like-two baboons

    wybo69 Jan 23, 2011 10:57 am

    As a former tuba player, I can assure you that tubas, like all brass instruments, do in fact use lube. It's called "Valve oil" but it's lube. And while it's not overpoweringly stinky, it's also not something you'd want to splash behind your ears before a hot date. Unless the girl in question is REALLY into tuba players.

    thedietcokeofevil Dec 09, 2010 1:52 am

    Agree with smackymcgee. Keep on smokin', it does you good.

    mama_appelsap Apr 02, 2010 4:14 pm

    i'm not sure that tubas even use lube..............unless you have a rather strange way of playing it.

    Stray523 Aug 28, 2009 8:39 pm

    LOL, I wonder if anyone ever mistook it as a Tube of Lube?

    PantsMan Jul 30, 2009 8:21 am

    This is great. I'm unworthy, I'm unworthy.

    JMonkey Apr 23, 2009 8:32 am

    I think the best part is you realized your mistake while you were stoned!

    smackymcgee Mar 13, 2009 11:15 am

    The first time I read this one was back in the '90's, and I laughed SO HARD that I nearly had to crawl under my desk at work. I was a consultant and was deathly worried that my employer would find me incapacitated by hysterics!

    Poikss Nov 26, 2008 6:35 pm