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    Latest Misheard Stories

    Artist: Statler Brothers

    Song: Eve

    The Story: Don't eat the fruit in the garden, Eden,, It wasn't in God's natural plan., You were only a rib,, And look at what you did,, To Adam, the father of Man.

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    Artist: Queens of the Stone Age

    Song: You Can't Quit Me Baby

    The Story: You smell like goat, I'll see you in hell

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    Artist: Starship

    Song: Sarah

    The Story: All the b***h had said, all been washed in black

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    Artist: Iron Maiden

    Song: The Prisoner

    The Story: And my blunt is my ho now

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    Artist: Pearl Jam

    Song: Jeremy

    The Story: At home, drawing pictures, Of mounds of tots, With ham on top

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    I've just got to have her, have her now
    I've got to keep Kosher but I don't know how

    Artist: Phil Collins
    Song: Sussudio
    Real Lyric: I've just got to have her, have her nowI've got to get closer but I don't know how

    The story:

    I included the correctly heard lyric first so the context makes sense. Keeping Kosher is a Jewish term for following the Kosher dietary laws. We used to use "Keep It Kosher" as in "Keep it on the down-low," or "do it right." This made sense to me. I've got to have her now... gotta "keep Kosher" but I don't know how. My girlfriend at the time thought my interpretation was hilarious but she didn't realize I really thought those were the lyrics. Even when I listen to the song today it sounds a lot more like "Keep Kosher" than "get closer." Today my wife just gets annoyed when I tell her those are the lyrics...

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