THE MISHEARD:

I am the first man to wet my pants

The story:

I read it on the internet and it all finaly made sense.

[Editor's note: Reader P-Lof adds the following note]:

I just thought that i'd point out, that in your Pearl jam section, Jason M submitted a lyric for "Do the evolution" where he said the misheard lyric was "I am the first man to wet my pants." Eddie Vedder is known for sometimes improvising lyrics during live shows. And he has actually, during some live performances sang the lyrics "...first man to wet to wet my pants" or sometimes, "...piss my pants". Pearl Jam also releases many of its live shows as albums. One album where Eddie does sing this lyric during Do the Evolution is on the 2003 Mansfield Mass live album. So it is very possible, depending on what recording Jason M was listening to, that he didn't mishear the lyric at all.